Chapter V – The War on Vajayjay

by The Liars' Den

 Let’s just start with the word vagina. Vagina. It sounds like an infection at best. Maybe a medical instrument. ‘Hurry, nurse, bring me the vagina.’ Vigina. Vagina. It doesn’t matter how many times you say the word, it never sounds like a word you want to say. In Great Neck, New York they call it a ‘pussycat.’ A woman told me there her mother used to tell her, ‘Don’t wear panties underneath your pajamas, dear,  you need to air out your pussycat.’

 –          Vagina Monologues

Update – 2/24/12:  Now includes titles and links to the articles referenced, as well as the names of the authors.

American’s having the attention span of a two year old should probably come as no surprise. This epidemic, although having a variable affect depending on the individual, is easily identifiable with simple observation of the many examples provided to support this claim. You need only observe the carousel-o-douchebags being shot to the top of the republican wanna-be nominees on almost a bi-weekly basis. If you are any decent at developing mathematical and/or statistical equations that can highlight and identify the rate at which each douche holds the top spot, followed by what the media calls “inexplicably” dropping in the polls like a ten pound weight in a swimming pool, please provide me with this at your earliest convenience. If you can even manage to give it a fancy name and provide color graphs and pictures to get the attention of the American public, I promise you that we shall change the world my friend.

Speaking of attention spans, the “news” coverage on the issues surrounding contraceptives, abortion pills, women’s rights, religion, and cherry kool-aid has apparently been delegated to page 2. Although I have spent considerable time discussing in the previous chapters, my findings on a somewhat similar topic proved too much to not share.

Recently, the state – pardon me, as the fancy people like to call it – the “Commonwealth” of Virginia has for some time been considering a bill in the legislature that would require any woman who wished to have an abortion – be it for medical or personal reason, except in the case of emergencies – to also have an ultrasound done prior to the abortion procedure. The governor of the “Commonwealth” of Virginia, Bob McDonnell, who had previously said he would sign the bill if it reached his desk, reversed course on his decision to support and sign the bill, indicating that he may have slight objections to ordering/forcing/demanding a woman to undergo a medical procedure – the ultrasound (Washington Examiner). While that is indeed an interesting tidbit, I wanted to point out something very important, as many on the “right” have belittled anyone who was in opposition to this bill since being introduced.

Mid-Blog-Post-Note: The intention of this blog was not for me to anyway stick up for any members of the press or writers of other opinion pieces. However, in the instance I am specifically referring to, of which I will post the exact details tomorrow, a “reporter/author” at one publication – leaning towards the right – blatantly lied in an article she wrote, to the extent that if each lie you told turned into excrement – or shit – then she would literally be full of it to the point of popping – similar in nature to the snozberry girl Violet in Willy Wonka – merely for the purpose of attempting to refute another “reporter’s/author’s” writing in their respective publication – leaning towards the left.

So to paraphrase – the author of the article in Slate  the publication leaning more left, let’s call her Linda Dahlia Lithwick, wrote about the Virginia lawmakers in the House producing a bill that in essence could be identified as ultrasound by forced penetration – thus equating it with rape. While it is slightly, and only slightly, an exaggeration, I see the argument that requiring and/or forcing an ultrasound – which could include a transvaginal ultrasound – on an unwilling participant, is somewhat similar to the legal definition of rape.

Although slightly overstated, I think the point was well made. Extreme attempts to create extreme laws need extreme comparisons. Apparently, an author at a right-leaning publication – let’s call her Rita –  Tina Korbe over at Hotair felt the opposite. Rita Tina felt it was preposterous to even attempt to compare an ultrasound – be it abdominal or transvaginal – to rape, and thus Linda’s Dahlia’s commentary was an insult to rape victims everywhere. One of Rita’s (just remember R = Right leaning publication, L = Left leaning publication) Tina’s comments went something along the lines of “not all ultrasounds are transvaginal, dummy!” all the while trying to disprove Linda Dahlia by basically calling her stupid, and then making up shit that she hoped would somehow disprove Linda’s Dahlia’s claim.

While Rita Tina is correct in that not all ultrasounds performed are transvaginal, and the type of ultrasound performed could – according to the law – be determined by the doctor performing the ultrasound, I decided to do a bit of research on my own. What I found was that Rita Tina thought she could make shit up and basically get away with it. Well, my bad.

One more thing – Rita Tina posted a link an excerpt from an article – calling the equating of an ultrasound to rape “dishonest” – containing the link to the VA House bill that she thought would prove her point, as though she had studied it thoroughly. What she hadn’t done was check the date, which was January 10, 2012, the date that the bill was originally re-introduced. The bill was amended on February 10, 2012 – it stated:

“Except in the case of a medical emergency, at least 24 hours before the performance of an abortion a qualified medical professional trained in sonography and working under the direct supervision of a physician licensed in the Commonwealth shall perform fetal ultrasound imaging and auscultation of fetal heart tine services on the patient undergoing the abortion for the purposes of determining gestational age.”

Basically, they want a woman seeking an abortion to have something stuck up their hoo-ha so that maybe that thought will make them not want to have an abortion…

Mid-Blog-Post-Note: I have no actual comments on the whole abortion issue at this time as that is not my reasoning in writing about this. The only purpose of today’s writing is to highlight an outright lie told by “Rita” with no regard that someone might actually believe the garbage she puts on paper. Shit like this is put down and distributed to a large number of people who can’t do research and can’t determine when a fact is a fact is a fact.

 To review:

Virginia wants women having abortions to undergo ultrasounds to determine the gestational (actual age) of the fetus – nevermind this can be accurately determined using other methods.

Many people, including Linda Dahlia Lithwick over at Slate, are upset over the government forcing a medical procedure on an unwilling participant. In some cases – and I’ll touch on this more in a moment – this medical procedure involves a device being inserted into a woman’s vagina. Because of this fact, Linda Dahlia, in an attempt to make a point, compared the requirement as being similar to rape.

Rita Tina over at Hotair, who seems to be full of hot air and likes to make shit up, as well as many other liars out there in the “news-entertainment-we make shit up-and-you believe-it business” said “not all ultrasounds are transvaginal.”

According to my sources, which include:

Beth Israel Deaconess Medical Center : “Transvaginal Ultrasound: …This type of ultrasound…is often used in the first trimester of pregnancy.”

The American College of Radiology, American Congress of Obstetricians and Gynecologist and the American Institute of Ultrasound in Medicine Practice Guidelines: “Fetal ultrasound should only be performed when there is a valid medical reason…” “The vaginal ultrasound or transvaginal ultrasound is actually used more frequently if the patient is 12 weeks pregnant or less.”

University of Pittsburgh Medical Center – Children’s Hospital of Pittsburgh: “Transvaginal ultrasound… is often used early in pregnancies.”

The Brookside Associates Medical Education Division – Military Obstetrics & Gynecology: “First trimester scanning can be performed using either an abdominal approach or a vaginal approach. In circumstances where both approaches are readily available, the greater detail provided by transvaginal scans usually outweighs other considerations, and is preferred. “

There you have it. Although transvaginal ultrasounds are definitely not the only kind of ultrasound, the bill up for vote only specified that the method of ultrasound would be chosen by the doctors and radiologists performing it using common medical standards and methods acceptable within the community. If transvaginal ultrasounds are recommended and preferred by the referenced medical institutions above (and many,  many,  many,  more I am sure of), which method do you think is going to be used the majority of the time?

I may write more about this tomorrow, but it is late and I am tired. Otherwise I would probably see if I could count how many times I wrote vagina/vaginal/transvagina and then promise to never do it again. Seriously, I’m going to start staying away from the women stories; you ladies and your damn drama.